Cruise Ships, Ruber Dinghys and Octopus Sandwiches
by Bonfiore'sGirl
Summary: Hayner, the only son of the richest family around, decides he's had enough and casts off from the cruise ship his parents had dragged him onto in a life-boat. Too bad he forgot to check the boat for stow-aways first. Seiner One-shot. Gift fic for FFF.


**Disclaimer: I don't own KH or Monopoly.**

**Dedication: This is dedicated to FinalFallenFantasy as an apology for not being a good beta. Sorry! I hope you like it!**

**Note: ~*~ is a page-break and signifies a slight change in POV. Between 3rd Person Limited Hayner and 3rd Person Limited Seifer.**

**This was a commision/apology fic with the request to use: 'dinghy' (as in 'rubber dinghy') or 'octopus' or 'sandwich'. I am proud to say I managed to use all of them! ^_^**

~*~

Hayner was sick and tired of always being perfect for his parents. He was tired of the expensive parties, high-class food, and "proper" dress suits. He wanted to really live! To go to a party at a trashy club, eat whatever junk he could get his hands on, wear anything he wanted and for as long as he wanted. Hayner wanted the freedom to be a normal teenager for once in his life!

But first, Hayner wanted off of this stupid cruise ship! That's why, at three in the morning, the blonde-haired brown-eyed boy was to be found loading a heavy cooler into a large, yellow rubber dinghy that served as one of the cruise liner's lifeboats. Getting in, he slowly lowered it to the water, as his over-protective mother had taught him. The rocking waves of the ocean began to pull the boat away from the larger vessel, and Hayner smiled, free at last.

~*~

Seifer was perfectly happy, dreaming about winning the national Struggle championships. He was raising the trophy up for all to see, when suddenly the ground disappeared beneath him, and he was falling, deeper and deeper into nothingness. Suddenly, he was caught by something, and rocked irregularly like a distracted mother rocking her baby in its cradle.

Sitting bolt upright, Seifer looked around himself, the blanket that had been covering him sliding off. The lifeboat he'd been sleeping in was in the sea, being pulled away from the large cruise ship… Wonderful.

A shout of surprise behind him caused him to whirl around. Sitting at the other end of the dinghy was a boy of about sixteen with dirty blonde, wavy hair, lightly tanned, soft looking skin and deep brown eyes. He seemed to be wearing a set of actual pajamas (what _guy_ actually wears pajamas?!); camouflage Capri's, a black sleeveless shirt with a lame skull design, and a green sleeveless jacket.

"Who the hell are you?!" the other boy's voice was deeper than expected, smooth and cocky. Seifer frowned.

"I was about to ask you the same question." The brown-eyed wonder crossed his arms and set his jaw determinedly, a face that made him look more like an angry chipmunk than a threat.

"I asked first, and am of a higher class than you, so etiquette says that you must answer first." Seifer's eye twitched. _Great, another stuck-up rich kid._

~*~

Hayner sat glaring, waiting for the stranger's response. He was sure the seventeen-year-old felt threatened by his intense stare and obvious wealth.

"Isn't it also etiquette that says when asking someone's name you should first introduce yourself?" came the reply. _Crap._ Hayner pursed his thick lips at the superior smirk of the other boy. It was quite obvious that the blue-eyed stranger wearing a beanie knew he'd won, and he seemed to really enjoy it.

"Fine. My name's Hayner Dincht. Son of the two people recently deemed by several magazines as the richest in the country. And you are?" The cocky stranger with the blue cut-off vest raised his blonde eyebrows, causing them to disappear beneath his black beanie and stretch the thin scar that trailed from just below his right eye to just over his left.

"I'm Seifer Almasy, illegitimate son of a drunken bum and his favorite whore." Hayner felt his own eyebrows skyrocket at so open and unfeeling an introduction. "Now then, rich boy, would you care to explain why you decided to float off, away from expensive heaven-on-earth, in my bed?"

Throwing his arms open wide in an explosive gesture, Hayner lamented, "It may be 'heaven-on-earth' to someone like you, but to me it's a floating jail cell! You wouldn't believe… Wait, did you just say 'your _bed_?!'" The rich boy looked appalled.

~*~

Seifer sighed and rolled his eyes, though he couldn't help smirking at the way Hayner talked with his hands. "Technically I said _my_ bed, but yes."

"But I thought the crew members all had cabins? Unless you're a stow-away!" Brown eyes looked first mildly concerned, then excited as the out-loud thoughts burst from his mouth. Seifer laughed condescendingly. Well, if he had to be lost at sea, at least he had entertainment to help pass the time.

"Nah, I share a cabin with a guy named Squall. However, despite the Captain's orders not to sleep with the guests, my oh-so considerate cabin-mate has kicked me out every night so far so that he may 'entertain' some of the pretty daughters of the rich passengers. Particularly that Rinoa chick he picked up on the second night. And so, I've been sleeping in this dinghy."

Hayner frowned indignantly, "Why don't you just kick him out and," here the younger boy felt the need to use air-quotes, "'entertain' the girls yourself?" Seifer smirked and leaned forward a little, a slight predatory look darkening his deep blue eyes. This wealthy brat really had no clue, did he?

"Because, spoiled rich girls really tend to hold a grudge if you kick them out of any place they feel they have a right to be, and I'm pretty sure Squall doesn't swing my direction." The effect was immediate. Chocolate eyes widened and the baby-face stretched in shock as Hayner unconsciously leaned away from Seifer.

~*~

A long awkward silence followed as Seifer sat up straight again and Hayner looked anywhere but at his companion.

"So, where were you planning to go once you cast away from the cruise liner?" Seifer asked eventually. Hayner shrugged, blushing as he caught Seifer's eye.

"I don't know. Guess I didn't think that far ahead," he replied truthfully. His embarrassment was soon replaced with an angry glower as Seifer gave an exasperated sigh.

"And I assume you didn't look around for any sign of land before you dropped us into the sea?" Hayner crossed his arms and refused to answer. How was _he_ supposed to think of all this stuff? He'd never even _seen_ the sea before his parents had decided to take him on this stupid cruise.

Seifer looked like he had completely given up hope for their survival, "I suppose you didn't bother to bring food or water, either, did you?"

At this, Hayner sat up straight and shot Seifer a vicious glare. He wasn't stupid! "Of course I brought food! What do you think is in the cooler, my laundry? And why would I need to bring water? We're surrounded by it! I brought a cup, we'll just drink from the sea."

Seifer froze and his jaw quite literally dropped three feet. Then he began to laugh. Wrapping his arms around his stomach, Seifer doubled over and laughed long and hard. Hayner's eyes narrowed as he felt his cheeks heat up. There was nothing wrong with the sea; it was made out of water, and all water was drinkable, right? …Okay, so maybe he was a little stupid.

~*~

Once Seifer could breathe again, he decided to let the other boy in on the joke. But why just tell him the punch line? Why not have some more fun first?

"Go ahead. Drink some seawater. I _dare_ you to fill your cup and chug it." Hayner gave him a suspicious glare before taking a large blue plastic cup out of his cooler and leaning over the side of the dinghy to fill it. One large gulp had him back over the side gagging and spluttering while Seifer laughed until his eyes teared up.

"Aw, man, lamer! You are too fun to mess with!" The smaller boy whirled on his newly defined enemy with his angry-chipmunk glare as he wiped his mouth on his arm.

"What'd you just call me?"

Seifer's laughter had settled down to soft chuckles, "I called you lamer."

"Could you have come up with a _lamer_ insult?" Hayner rebutted, crossing his arms and smirking at his clever comeback. Seifer merely shrugged, unaffected.

"It's either lamer or chickenwuss."

Hayner's brow furrowed as he glared, "If you _ever_ call me 'chickenwuss,' I'll-"

"Chickenwuss it is!" Seifer interrupted with an, 'I dare you to try something' smile. The rich boy just snapped his mouth shut and clenched his jaw angrily.

With that settled and the realization that he was hungry, Seifer reached into the cooler and pulled out one of many sandwiches wrapped in a zip-lock bag. Ignoring Hayner's squawk of protest, he took a large bite, and regretted it immediately. Something long, chewy, and oddly textured slithered down his throat as he forced himself to swallow.

"What the hell is in these sandwiches?!" For once, Hayner got to roll his eyes.

"It's octopus, numbskull. It's a delicacy. If you don't like it, put it back. Serves you right for trying to eat my provisions." Seifer opened his mouth to reply, but a sudden jerk on the front of the dinghy sent him flying forward to land on top of the smaller boy, and caused the octopus sandwich to fall into the deep blue sea.

Seifer sighed as he propped himself up on his arms, looking down at the blushing and bewildered sixteen-year-old beneath him. "Did you untie the tether rope, chickenwuss?"

"The w-what?" Hayner spluttered, more than a little flustered that there was a gay man on top of him.

"The tether rope. The mile-long, extra length of rope that ties the life-boat to the ship in case one should break free in a storm," Seifer explained, ignoring the near-panicked look on Hayner's face for now, but logging it away in his memory for use later.

"N-no. I didn't kn-know there was o-one."

"Well, it seems you're not completely useless after all. Once they figure out we've cast off but are still tied on, they'll pull us in, and-" Seifer cut himself off to look at Hayner, who looked like he wanted to disappear into the bottom of the dinghy. If what Seifer felt in his thigh was what he thought it was, then blood was rushing to more than just the wealthy boy's face.

The beanie-clad boy sat up and moved back to his previous position towards the front of the dinghy slowly, looking at Hayner thoughtfully. "Chickenwuss, has it ever occurred to you that you might be gay?" The other boy sat up hesitantly and shook his head, unwilling to speak. With a newly interested and calculating eye, Seifer looked Hayner up and down. He wasn't half bad looking, actually pretty cute. _And I bet he can be dead sexy when he wants to,_ Seifer thought. Noticing the rich boy's nervous shiver, he decided to push further. "You pulled this whole 'float out to sea' stunt to escape your parents, right?"

Hayner nodded slowly, a suspicious look in his deep eyes. Seifer smirked, "Just think how shocked they would be if you _were_ gay?" Seifer could practically see Hayner's ears perk up. "I bet they have this nice little plan for you to get married to a trophy wife and have two and a half kids and live a quiet, rich little life, huh?" Hayner was being drawn in, literally beginning to lean forward as he nodded. "Well, having a boyfriend would ruin that plan. You could rebel against them while still living in the rich comfort you're used to. And who knows, you might just find out who you really are instead of who your parents want you to be." Seifer was leaning in now too. Hayner hesitated, biting his lip, and started to back off. _Okay, so maybe he needs a little more incentive._

"Kiss me. Stop being your parent's puppet. C'mon. I dare you." Hayner lurched forward and their lips collided painfully, but neither stopped the kiss, and it turned into something softer than Seifer was used to. It was chaste, hesitant, slow and indecisive. Seifer started to move his lips against Hayner's as the rich kid relaxed into the kiss. Soon hands were in hair and arms were wrapped around bodies as they tried to pull each other closer.

Another tug on the tether rope sent them sprawling, and Seifer once again found himself laying on top of his Chickenwuss. _My Chickenwuss… I like the sound of that._ The sun had begun to rise, and, looking back at the ship, Seifer saw the other crewmembers reeling them in.

"So… Does this mean you're my boyfriend?" Hayner asked, calling the taller boy's attention back to him.

Seifer chuckled, "Have you ever actually been in a relationship before, Chickenwuss?"

Hayner frowned at the continued use of the nickname, "No, I haven't. Does that change anything?"

"No, I guess it doesn't. Alright, Chickenwuss, yeah, I'm your boyfriend." Seifer was amused at how completely innocent this kid was. And when Hayner's face broke out into a huge smile, his heart actually skipped a beat. _This kid's gonna change my life._ Seifer had no idea where the thought came from, but he instantly felt it to be true, and allowed a soft smile to spread on his face.

Suddenly, Hayner's smile turned from just happy to devious. "In that case, what do you say tomorrow night I bring Monopoly to your cabin and we kick Squall and his girlfriend out so that _they_ can sleep in the dinghy?" Seifer let out a surprised laugh.

"I like the way you think, Chickenwuss."

~*~

**A/N - So, that was it! Sorry it took so long to get it up! I promised to have it up by April 1st, I believe, and I made it! Yay! I hope you liked it, and I really hope I managed to keep them mostly in-character. Please review to tell me how I did! And if there's something I can do better or change, please tell me! It's the only way I improve.**

**Thanks for reading!**

**- Bon'sGirl**


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